FOR SEVERAL WEEKS our new neighbors were
bothering me. They live across the way and stay up late and talk
loudly. They watch movies and talk over the movie to each other,
oblivious to the many neighbors around here who are sleeping
and because it is summer, everyone has their windows open.
I had asked them to please keep it down,
and they would for awhile, but then they forgot, and I think,
after a few beers, it is easy to forget to be quiet.
So last week, I called the cops. He came
out and warned those guys they were making too much noise and
next time they'd all get a 250 dollar fine. They said, "What
noise?" They had no idea. They are three college boys rooming
They have been quieter, but still staying
up late and talking loudly. One night a couple days ago, I was
up late and they were making their usual sounds, disturbing the
quiet night. I felt upset by it. I was angry at them for giving
me something to have to deal with. I could let it go, but it
kept disrupting me. I was trying to read and kept getting distracted.
Occasionally the three of them would burst out laughing at the
same time, startling me.
So I turned on the sound of a cascading
waterfall to temporarily block their sounds and meditated for
about twenty minutes. When I was feeling very relaxed, I thought
about what I could do and came up with a solution.
The next day when I saw two of them out
on their porch, I had a conversation with them, told them what
was going on with me, and said I heard the cop talking to them
and I think 250 dollars is awfully harsh, and I had a better
solution: How about they give me their phone number? Then rather
than calling the cops, I could just call them. One of the guys
said, "Sure." He gave me his name and number. They
apologized for making noise, and thanked me for my solution!
I actually made a couple of friends. I've had to call them only
a few times and they quieted down right away. It was a good solution
I might only have made in a state of deep calm.
Make this a rule: Make decisions and initiate
actions only when you are very calm.
At other times, when you feel yourself
stressing, do nothing, say nothing, until you can get yourself
to a quiet room where you can meditate or deeply relax in some
way. Afterwards, when you're in a state of deep calm, then make
your decision or initiate an action if that's what you decide